Today I was reminded that everything that happens in our lives, good, and bad is all a part of God’s plan. Granted, I already knew that, but this time around it was honestly hard to hear. I took a deep breathe and shrunk into my seat after I was reminded of this fact, because right now the things that are coming up in my life are scary. And well, I’m questioning God’s plan & goodness.

God knows EXACTLY what I am going to find out on Thursday, and He isn’t afraid. He is ready to give me strength for whatever is thrown my way. And He is ready to grow me through it. This is a season where I am watching my faith be challenged, and waiting in hopeful expectation that in the end-my faith will grow, and I will grow. Even if right now I’m completely terrified, because let’s be real. I am.

There is no hiding from the scary. Trust me. I’ve tried on a hundred different days, and a million different ways to hide from the scary things. It’s just not possible.

Even if right now I’m running millions of miles away from God, I’m still not far enough for Him to not want to be with me. I’m working on inviting God into where I am, because in the end He will meet me here, teach me here, and love me here. In the end, He will walk me into whatever I have been avoiding, because there is no growth in avoiding the hard, and if I truly trust God with my life, what’s the point of avoiding things?

But here we are, and I’m going to be real honest with you people. I’m avoiding. I know deep down that God’s got this. But I’m only human, and I have real fears that are creeping up, and ya know what? God still loves me, even when I am not pursuing Him completely. And He will continue to love me, every. step. of. the. way.

And if you are my friend, or know me outside the walls of this blog. Thank you for praying with me, walking with me, and supporting me through this whole season. I love you. 

Taylor Kate