Ya know, I live in Florida, the flattest state in all of the land. So I don’t know what it’s like to have to walk uphill for a long period of time. The only time I walk uphill is when Maura and I walk the bridge by our house. That is just about the only “hill” I ever have to climb as long as I am living in Florida.

Even though I haven’t been doing much literal climbing, life is an uphill battle a lot of the time. Cue The Climb by Miley Cyrus

I am still facing days where I am tired, and feel like I am just dragging myself through my days. God gives me extra grace for those days but when it comes to me allowing myself to receive that grace, I struggle.

I don’t know if it’s because I don’t think I deserve the grace, or I feel like I should just be able to somehow get through all of this without God’s grace and strength, but whatever my reasons are, they aren’t right. I’m just a person, so desperate for God.

Our worst days are never so bad that we are beyond the reach of God’s grace, and our good days are never so good that we are beyond the need for God’s grace.

With that being said: Every. Day. We. Need. Grace.

At least I know I do.

I’m about to talk about something I have never really talked about before on my blog, or really with anyone but my closest friends.

Don’t worry I didn’t commit a crime or anything.

It is something that has required me to have extra grace and love for myself, and that is-my appearance.

One thing about having PCOS that has bothered me besides just being tired all the time is the fact that I break out like never before. To the point where it is hard for me to want to leave my apartment without a full face of makeup on. I look in the mirror and I don’t like what I see. And it sucks, because God created me in His image, and I know that He doesn’t like it when I look in the mirror in the morning and cringe. I have had to learn so much in this season that I’m no less beautiful just because I’m having these problems.

But insecurities are a real thing, and I am in the midst of them. And I’m fighting. Fighting against every negative thought that creeps in my mind about my appearance. But honestly today I am proud of myself because I am sitting in Starbucks writing this post with no makeup on. Learning to be comfortable in my skin is my new mission.

Like I said friends, it’s a climb. Somedays I feel like I am on the top of a mountain, feeling great, so excited about what God is doing, and then there are days where I look in the mirror or I wake up in a lot of pain, and I feel like I’m in the deepest valley, and God is nowhere to be found.

Right now I am mid-climb, reaching for the top of that next mountain. Being cheered on by the friends that God has blessed me with, and being energized by all the coffee, and lots of scripture.

And I am thankful for it all. Because every struggle and victory is part of my story that is written by God, and I know He wastes nothing.

Taylor Kate